Kinky Tapas
Are you new to kink and don’t have an idea of where to start?
Do you have some experience in BDSM and kink and want to increase your skill set?
Do you want to be in a space that’s BIPOC-centered that can fulfill your needs?
Join this 3-day retreat and get your kink on with 2 experienced facilitators, hands-on practice and small group learning!
What did you miss at Kinky Tapas Oakland?
Kinky Tapas in Oakland was our premiere 3 day, BIPOC-centered retreat. It was a dream come true for us. Read the highlights and check out some pics!

FAQ
What does BIPOC-centered mean?
BIPOC is an acronym that usually refers to Black, Indigenous and People of Color. Our space centers the experience of BIPOC people and communities by recognizing the impact that race and racism has on our physical, emotional and erotic well-being. We will hold space for conversations that help all of us understand the impact that systemic and interpersonal racism has on our kinky experiences. If you’re committed to dismantling racism in kink spaces, you’ll have a chance to unpack your experiences as you build skill.
Can I bring my partner(s)?
Absolutely! Bringing a partner guarantees you someone to play with and practice on, so the more, the merrier! You don’t need a partner to participate in hands-on activities - we will make sure you get the experience you’re looking for. Kinky Tapas Couples Edition is designed specifically for those seeking out a partnered-learning experience.
Is this event only for women?
Nope! This event is for everyone regardless of your gender identity. We speak in gender neutral and technical terms, so that it’s accessible regardless of what you were assigned at birth.
How many people will be attending?
We have limited space in order to keep the group small. There will be two facilitators to help with one-on-one support.
Will there be nudity or live sex?
There will be nudity on occasion if the practice requires it for proper technical instruction. You will never be required to participate in a session if you are uncomfortable or uninterested in the technique. Participants and instructors will not be nude or engaging in live sex.
Is this a hands-on event? Will I get to practice techniques?
Absolutely! We will be practicing with and on each other. You will definitely get to practice! You are welcome to participate as an observer if hands-on doesn’t feel right for you.
I’m a complete newbie - is this an appropriate event for me?
It sure is! We welcome newbies and those with moderate kink skills who want to learn more. We will not be teaching advanced kink techniques such as needle play, piercing, or blood chokes.
Do I have to attend all the sessions? What if I’m not into certain topics?
Hell no! Do you boo! You can feel free to attend the things you want to do. If you are not into certain topics, you can definitely opt out of the teachings. We will have alternative assignments for you to develop your skills if you opt out of a session.
Will I get to meet the other participants before?
We will have a meet and greet the day before the workshops begin, so yes, you will be able to meet the other participants beforehand, if you choose.
Do we have to pay all at once?
No, you don’t! We have payment plans available! Just email marla@velvetlipsllc.com and she'll hook you up!
What happens if I have to cancel?
You will be able to get a full refund up to 3 weeks before the event. After that, you will get 50% up to one week before the event. The week of the event, you will not receive a refund.
How do we get to the venue?
You’ll be provided with details about where to get to the event venues closer to the date. Transportation to and from are your responsibility. Within the group there might be opportunities for ride-sharing or travel buddies.
Can you book my flights?
No, you must book your own flight.
What COVID precautions are you taking?
You will have to upload your vaccination card when purchasing your ticket.
What do I need to bring?
We will have kinky tools for you to experiment with and we’ll point you in the direction of our fav retailers. No pressure to bring any of these things, but if you’re feeling in the mood bring:
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Kinky outfits (optional)
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Comfortable clothing
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Your kink toys, gear or pervertables
How is this different or better than just booking a trip to a dungeon on my own?
We are actually teaching you kink skills! Yes, you could probably go to a kink conference, but at conferences, you typically don’t get to practice. Not only will you be able to practice and hone your skills, you will also get focused instruction with a small group of like-minded individuals who are eager to learn just as much as you are. We are committed to building your kink confidence, creativity and technique.